Destiny and fantasy, do dah do dah

Much in the same way that a feeling of complete control grants comfort and a sense of stability, so too does the complete lack of control. Moreover, it is easy to participate in. All you have to do is look down at the morass of troubles, complications, and burdens that life has set upon you, and fall in.--gabriel

And then suddenly we are come around to sex, like obedient little Freudians. There are more submissives than there are dominants, if internet discussions can be believed. Why? Because the lack of control is easy, and when you aren't in control, it isn't your fault.

Rape fantasies grow thick on the ground. What's interesting are the two common motivations:

1. It's my fantasy and I'm in complete control, and
2. It's my fantasy and I'm in complete submission.

Which leads me to one conclusion. Brains are neat. And I don't mean in a crunchy zombie way, either.

What's most fascinating is that with all of our ways of reinventing the world each time we look at it, we don't manage to reinvent our friends out of existence. Gabriel still puts up with me. Why? I haven't bribed him yet this year or anything.

Line by line critiques

(Originally posted at Gazebo.)

Different boards seem to have different expectations when it comes to line-by-lines. Recently, I joined an email group with some old friends, and I got a detailed lbl on a poem. My reaction was one of dismay. I thought "There is a forest here, not just trees."

Which made me start thinking about lbl critiques in general. And it made me realize that I don't like them. I don't like giving them (though I used to) and I don't like receiving them. I think the tendency toward giving them results in a habit of nitpickery instead of treating the poem as a choerent whole that should be judged as a coherent whole.

A few years ago someone said that her problem with workshops is they assumed the poem was broken instead of assuming the poem was finished. That observation really hit home with me, and changed my approach to workshopped poems. With that change came my change in attitude toward line by lines. I wouldn't read a novel and critique it that way. I wouldn't read a book of poems and critique each one that way. Only as an exercise would I break a poem down into its components in such a way. So why would I do so in a workshop?

So, here are my thoughts:

1. Line by line critiques encourage fault finding and nit picking.

2. Poems are more than the sum of their parts and few poems can withstand such total deconstruction.

3. Poems should be approached as if they were complete and only when that author wants more specific information should the poem be dissected.

4. Line by line critiques inject too much of the critiquer and do not often benefit anyone but beginning writers.

5. Line by line critiques take too much time and discourage workshop participation.

What say you?

Love is a many splendored thingamajig

Ultimately, destiny is about how we mean. Destiny looks for an external source of meaning, while a rejection of destiny looks internally for a source of meaning.--gabriel

But, mine leetle snowflakeski, you are forgetting something. Destiny isn't just about how we mean, but who's responsible.

Geek Chorus: "Oh, you'll find Mr. Right eventually!" "Don't compromise!" "Don't settle!" "It will all work out."

This is how we treat what meaning we've got. Love is meaning, and we paint it rosy colors and pawn it off as someone else's responsibility.

Tragic Zero: "I had an affair, but it was true love!" "I couldn't help myself." "I missed my one chance at happiness."

Who needs to try when the failure is already set? Trying isn't necessary with Destiny. It's a fool's game, a waste of time. Better off watching TV and eating Cheetos.

Geek Chorus: "There's someone for everyone!"

No, there isn't. Some humans won't be loved because they aren't worth loving. Because they are chunks of wood instead of people. Because they are takers instead of givers. Now I sound like a Hallmark Card.

Tragic Zero: "Wah!"

Oh, put a sock in it.

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